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is learning something new.

Yes, it’s an accomplishment and it’s something to be proud of and sometimes it may even be enjoyable, but it’s always hard. Harder than just knowing, at least. If you have to take the time to learn it than there is going to be a struggle involved. You will have to train your mind new functions, new details, new processes.

I think most people will agree that the worst part about starting a new job is the training portion of it. Getting the hang of it. Learning the ropes. Whatever, it usually takes longer than you want it too, or longer than you’re willing to admit it took. I’ve been at my job since June. It’s been a very long time to still be training.

Ugh.

My specific job I understand. My daily functions I have down, pretty close to perfectly. I’m proud of that. I got through my training and I picked up on my own routine in doing it and I’ve succeed at it. I was then trained in another portion of my department, and after a little while I learned that too and can now step into two different positions in my department and handle the work handed to me. But, along with my promotion was a stipulation: that I must be able to work each position in the department on my own, (since there is only one person in each position here, we all have to know how to do everything in case one of us calls in sick or goes on vacation, the rest of us need to know how and be able to pick up the slack). I am currently learning the hardest, most detailed portion of the department, and I’ve been going a little crazy doing so.

It’s not so bad it’s just extremely detailed and a little over my head. I’m getting it, slowly, but at the same time I’m terribly, terribly frustrated by it. I know how to do it well enough to know when I’m making a mistake, but I don’t know it well enough to know exactly what type of mistake I’m making. So, going back and trying to find my mistake when I don’t know exactly what I’m looking for…. well… it’s causing me to want to throw myself out the window… and I’m on the fifth floor.

My coworker/friend/trainer is supportive and helpful and I do believe she understand my struggles with it and hopefully she doesn’t think I’m completely brainless. I know I’ll be very happy and proud once I can do it on my own. I will feel smart and successful and I’ll be even happier at the job I love. I just have to get there.

I will get there in time. I will. There are about a gazillion steps to this part of the job and it takes a long time to learn a gazillion steps. I was given 2.5 months to learn it and it’s been about 2, I have a few weeks left…In the mean time, lets hope I stay away from the window.

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