When it was Kyle’s turn to turn 25 last year, he made it known he didn’t want it to be a big deal. No celebrations. So, of course, I threw him a surprise party. I had to! It was his twenty-fifth! It’s a big one!
But me, I decided right off the bat that I wanted to celebrate. This is 2013 and I already decided that this was going to be one hell of an amazing year, but besides the desire for a party, how am I feeling about my quarter of the century mark?
I feel incredibly strange. I feel like all those things I spent most of my adult life saying “maybe in a few years” about, the time is here, or passed, or passing, or something. I feel like if I continue to say “maybe in a few years” I’ll be thirty! Granted, none of these things are even optional right now. I guess I just thought at twenty five I’d be more grown up (even though I’m plenty grown up already).
And yet, I’m exactly where I want to be in my life right now. Exactly. I don’t feel too far ahead or too far behind, I feel like I’m right where I’m supposed to be. I like the direction my career is heading in, I love my friends, family and boyfriend. Kyle is on track for his dreams and I’m on track for mine.
Twenty Five. Shucks.
I get what Kyle tried to explain last year. It’s just a different place. Not good, not bad. Just different. It’s like, when you’re growing up and you see your semi-distant family and they say “you’re sixteen! you’re eighteen! how in the world could you possibly be that much older? you should still be this big!” and you roll your eyes and think ‘duh I haven’t seen you in three years obviously I’m three years older”. But that is how I am feeling, right now, about myself. “Twenty-five?! What? No, I must be mistaken. I did the math wrong. I was born in ’88 and it’s 2013 now… oh shit that does equal 25…”
So anyways, how do I feel? I guess I just feel baffled.And, I still have 4 1/2 more days. Bring it on 2013. Bring it on.